Just Another Whiney Monday

I'm a little beat up. Had the day off and all I managed to do was take the dog for a couple of walks and buy some groceries. I have a little bit of a chest cold, nothing serious, but I've had a slightly painful cough since yesterday. The weather was nice all day but I just didn't have the energy to do much but cook a couple of meals, some fish and pasta. I think the long hours are taking a bit of a toll. My work shifts are typically 12-14 hrs. A 10 hr. shift feels like a half day. I think I'm working around 62-70 hrs. per week. One day last week I nodded off at my desk while working on some paperwork, and I routinely take quick naps on the subway. Trouble is, I'm not sure whether I'm experiencing work fatigue, middle age or HIV related side effects. Wouldn't it be a bitch if it was a little of each? I do know I'm feeling guilty about not having time for Jet. Some days I walk him, leave for work, come home, walk him again and go to bed. I try to make myself feel better by keeping in mind he's worlds better off than on the street or in a shelter headed for a doggie dirt nap. On my days off, and I do get them regularly now, I try to give him extra special attention.

I'm frustrated that I don't have time to get to the gym at all, and I don't like the fact that I only get to one Gay-A meeting a week. I had another dream where I had already gotten drunk before I realized what I'd done, but in this dream I actually felt a little relief mixed with the revulsion. I woke up in a foul mood, disgusted that I'd even dreamed a moment of weakness.

My feet hurt and my knees are throbbing and achy. I could use a full body massage, I'd even forgo the release. Maybe.

In Other News ...

I'm trying to decide what I want to buy most. I'm shopping for a new air conditioner for my bedroom, but it's not an emergency as I already have one. I'm just looking for a bigger, newer, colder model. I've also been regretting my decision to forego a TV in my bedroom. Also not an emergency as I can watch a lot of my favorites on line these days. NBC.com does as awesome job streaming TV shows. I never miss Heroes because of this, and the ads don't bother me at all. But I am in a bit of a panic as the new season of So You Think You Can Dance starts this week, and I work every Thursday without fail. So a visit to my Time Warner office seems likely. I believe a DVR is in my future ...