Thursday, November 27, 2003


Woke up today feeling mighty ambitious and under the gun. We will be putting up our holiday decorations on Saturday and Sunday. Last year was my second Christmas at the bar. The first year I hadn’t really gotten a handle on how things worked all the time and while I mentioned that it was time to start thinking about holiday decorations and then mentioned that Christmas was fast approaching I hadn’t yet learned that if I wanted something done and done on my timetable I would have to just pick up the ball and run for daylight. So by the second year I knew to just go out frequently during November and accumulate what we need gradually. I spent over $700 on new ornaments, ribbons, bows, lights etc. I spent another few hundred on pay for design help. It worked out great. Last year the bar was DONE child! Some people hated it, most people liked it. And all of December the bar was a holiday wonderland. Problem is, this year it was expected that I would at least meet if not outdo myself. And I have a lot more irons in the fire this year. In my favor, I did manage to box up most of what we purchased last year and save it. (as opposed to previous years, apparently. We had almost nothing saved from any holiday when I looked for it)

So after a bit of procrastination I did in fact finally manage to hunker down and try to come up with a décor plan for this year. Admittedly, I can cut corners a bit now as far as planning because I have a pretty good idea at this point what will work and what won’t. I know what the focal points in the room are and where to concentrate the treatments. But still, you have to make a plan of some sort. So most of this week has seen my brain cells working on a decorating plan. We had decided to re-use some of the things that were a hit last year but I didn’t want to just duplicate it. I’m a firm believer in tweaking things. Making adjustments. Keeping what works and trying new things. I did a little pre-shop recon yesterday after my group to figure out what was available and what I needed and today was all about getting it done.

But first, I needed to visit my favorite thrift store. OK, one of them. Speaking of my group I had gone to a meeting Tuesday and once I was there I discovered to my horror that the khaki pants I was wearing were horribly stained by grease spots and … other areas. I decided to throw them away and I also decided I didn’t have enough “tween” pants. Something between jeans and dress. I got a couple of pairs of cords and a shirt for $20.

Next I headed down to St. Vinny’s to visit The Hellcat. He’s been having ongoing problems from a wicked bad reaction to a spider bite. The bite area and his whole foot had swollen like crazy and apparently the antibiotics they put him on weren’t working. They finally had to admit him to the hospital to open up the wound and (I assume) scoop the goo out. I stopped at MickeyD’s to smuggle him some cheeseburgers and fries. I found M--- to be in pretty good spirits despite an overnight hospital stay and by the time I arrived he had already been discharged and was waiting to have some prescriptions filled. You know, let me just say here that I’m really impressed with how M--- has seemingly turned things around. After a horrific year full of suicide and good friends getting sick and dying you wouldn’t be that surprised if my girl had just jumped into a vat of crystal and not come out. Now, I’m not with him 24/7 and he is not shy about popping a pill for anything that ails him but I have to say, all this hardship seems to have only brought out the best in M--- and I for one am glad we’ve been able to form a friendship. Every sense I can bring to bear tells me that inside he is a really nice man. And I hope the spirits hear that and give him a good peaceful year next year. He needs it.

Onward to the party store for Christmas stuff. Because I had saved so much from last year I was able to concentrate on “extras” that I wouldn’t have bought last year. Animatronic figures and chaser lights and candy cane stair lights and I basically found everything we needed. And it looks like I’ll only have to spend about $200 or so (not counting extra payroll). I lugged about four bags of doo-dads and lights and who-hash back to the apartment. I actually had to stop because I had more than I could carry. I went home for a bit but decided to venture out and just finish the bulk of it so I bought a couple more animatronic figures, about 20 battery operated candles and we’re done, right? Not so fast, Helen. I still need to get to the hardware store for fishing wire and staples and ornament hangars.

I thought I was just about done and done in but on my way back from the Odd Job/Job Lot (Cheap crap made cheap and sold cheap) I managed to (intellectually, anyway) conceive of a way I might be able to work in a couple of work outs this weekend and get my training back on track. My backfat is truly out of control. So I decided to start with a ½ hour cardio ½ hour ab workout just to get the juices flowing. Oh, déjà vu. And…’s over. It felt good as did I.

My intent was to head to the bar and start dropping some of my purchases there or possibly go out on the town seeing as how the night before Thanksgiving is a pretty fun one usually. But shortly after both my room mate’s had gone out for the night, I discovered that all I wanted was a smart little cocktail and some muted lighting and some HBO and some scented candles and my cute lil ’laptop in my castle high atop Second Ave. For these things above all others, I am well and truly thankful. Have a nice day and enjoy the holiday.

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

Quite the weekend.

Not sure where this is going. I had quite a work week (end). Aside from the usual nonsense, I had the unenviable task of firing two people and cutting the schedule for another. I had two of my other girls be hospitalized, one from an allergic infection and one from AIDS complications. Everyone is on the road to recovery, but it meant making phone calls and contingency plans and re-arranging schedules for people. When you're unsure of just how ill someone is or how long you have to arrange coverage it's a daily chore of putting people in place for a theoretical absence and then "pulling the trigger" on it when the absence is confirmed. On top of that I got me some new girls that we finally managed to make permanent schedules for. So I'm dealing with a whole slew (OK 3) of gay men from many lands. And finally, I was informed recently that I'm making my new room mate "uncomfortable and unwelcome". Add a layer of allegations that I'm "gunning for" HIV positive employees and my head feels like my brain may liquify and leak out my ears.

First, the firings. I had to let go one of our performers and I'm not sure why exactly. I freely admit, when he started I thought he had the personality of lettuce. I still don't think you would ever associate him with the phrase "rollicking good time" but there's no getting around that he's a talented musician and capable performer. It seems he's being used as proof that the bar is being managed. Something is being done. Heads have rolled. Changes have been made. All a part of an ongoing desire to react to a slight dip in revenue and to preserve the status quo. Or rather avenues to a paycheck and alcohol. The second firing was just a case of someone wanting me to take action, even if he may not have understood that's what he wanted. He had repeatedly just not shown up for scheduled shifts. There was always a reason that had to do with either his HIV medication or his medication for a bi-polar disorder or a lost weekend due to his crystal meth addiction. Seeing a pattern? As did I. And while I'm able to try to allow people to see that their addiction/drug use/dependancy has gotten out of hand and let them keep their job while they try to get themselves under control, there is only so far I'm willing to go. He clearly crossed the line and I finally felt that my sense of self respect would take a huge hit if I didn't act. And as much as I'm willing to take a chance I can't let other employees think that that kind of behavior is acceptable. If you don't show up for work and nothing bad happens to you than you have to show up for work when you don't feel like it why, exactly? You see my point? It wasn't HIV. It wasn't bi-polar. It was you have to show up for work when expected to or at least let me know when you can't so I can fix it.

Case in point. My employee who had to be hospitalized. He got word to us that he wouldn't be available for a few days and assured us that he would let us know when he was returning. A little up in the air but you're dealing with health/medicine and it's inherently inexact. That's OK. I can cover his shifts until he's better. That's what I do. But you have to arm me with information before I can ride into battle for you. Everyone (HIV+ or not) is allowed to get sick. But they have to remember I'm running a business around all this chaos. Hopefully, message received.

And besides, it makes The Hellcat's misadventure with his infected bug bite (seriously!) seem positively benign. I'm off to visit him in St. Vinnie's and smuggle in some cheeseburgers. The food there is the horrible stuff of legend. Ta-ra!

Sunday, November 23, 2003

Here's what I can't figure out

About this news coverage on Michael Jackson. I can't even fathom what journalists in America are really supposed to be doing. I mean, has no one in the last 15 or so years gone to a producer and said "Hey, I think this Michael Jackson may have really gone nuts. How about I do a story trying to prove it?" It's one thing when it's straight news reporting (who,what, when etc.) but now that we've moved to the talking head stage where people just sit on a news set and yammer away and speculate about possible future events is no one going to point out that he may be insane???? Insane with scads of money but insane none the less.

Exhibit A

It's sad that in his madness there was no one not one doctor who told him "No, Mr. Jackson if I do another procedure on you I can guarantee your nose will fall off and you will look like some garish clownish approximation of an actual human being." Or perhaps one did and he just went to someone else who just took his money no questions asked. Or perhaps subconsciously there was a part of MJ at war with the crazy pedophile part of his personality and he intentionally scarred himself as some sort of wierd internal penance. I know, I'm reaching. The poor bastard is just rich and crazy. No excuse for abusing children though. You want a special kind of crazy? Check in with "his own" kids (HA!) in about 20 yrs

I also don't understand why no one is pointing out that known pedophiles frequently put themselves in positions that give them access to their target children. So the fact that MJ has built an entire compound as a sort of giant "child-trap" makes him seem like nothing more than the ultimate uber-pedophile. A pedophile on an unlimited budget.

Thursday, November 20, 2003

As promised

I want to share my impressions of my newly added blogfriends I’ve listed at right. Yeah right friends, I’ve only met one and traded e-mails with a couple others. As I’ve said before, I periodically edit my list. If people stop posting for a while or start to bore me. I also will add new blogs and try them out for a few weeks. So just because someone is on the list don’t necessarily take it as an endorsement I may just be test driving it. And before anyone points out the obvious yes, I know that all the blogs I follow are written by men and they’re all gay (or slut). It’s not that I hate the heteros but I don’t feel like they need me to cover them. I occasionally post het friendly material, though. I don’t mind the straights, as long as they keep to themselves. OK hang on:

Truth coming at ya

Addaboy- First on my list (A= Addaboy) Doesn’t post any pictures so I’ve never seen him but I suspect he’s a cutie. I like what he writes and am always entertained. I’d want to sleep with him which of course, means I could hire him.

::matty::- he’s cute

601am- This is a new addition. I don’t know how I feel about it, yet.

bj- Who doesn’t follow his exploits? Will surprise you with particularly well thought out pieces on homosexuality, erotica and legal precedents. And besides, the muthafucka has waaaaayyy more sex than I do He’s from Australia and he can be a bit pedantic. The redemptive features are his links to some hilarious other material.

DOGPOET.COM- Another new addition. I jumped on for the Folsom St cum-stained Tshirt story and was instantly hooked.

Devon the Escort’s Journal- One of the only bloggers I actually have met. I think he’s got quite a set of stones to do what he’s doing in such a public forum. He fascinates me but I do not think we’ll ever have sex.

Dylan Scott’s Journal- This bad boy I’ve been cyber stalking for years. I want to do filthy things to/with and on him. Then I want him to do them to and on me.

Formerly Infatuated- He almost lost me several times but he always manages to pull an impressive post out of the hat and I decide to stick with him for a while longer

Gay Porn Blog- see title

GeekSlut- What do I say about my buddy? We haven’t actually met yet only swapped e-mails. Again, I respond when people just go completely “out there”. I have a feeling we’re going to have sex. I hope we become friends and I hope he doesn’t break me.

jb- Another newbie to my list. He’s a guy he lives here so that gets you in at least.

Kill Your Boyfriend- Hey, if this doesn’t hold your attention nothing will. Why is this guy still alive? Don’t get me wrong I’m real glad he is but hoo-ya. This cat has LIVED.

Lionshaker- He’s English and I think he has stopped posting. Check out that pouty English boy face. I would fantasize about watching him blow me. I still do.

My Life As An Echo…- Totally do-able.

Sardonic Bomb- Lot’s of fun stuff on his blog. Love the Piggy interviews. He really does send you the password

Satan’s Laundromat- Not a blog at all but a photo journal. I love this site. Some of the pictures are brilliant

SignalShift*- He’s young, he’s vain he’s gorgeous. I hate her. Looking everywhere for naked pix of her.

thinking & drinking- My newest pal. Let me just say this. You mess with my new baby you got a whole load of NYC whupass heading right for ya.

Vivdblurry- Toby. You gotta admit he’s interesting. I’ve said it before. Now that I’m too old for him I want him to do filthy things with others and send me pictures. Lots and lots of pictures. Video too

Youngbradford- Just cause everyone does, really.

So there you have it. I make a deliberate effort to keep the list from getting much bigger so I usually try to do a one man on, one man off rule. (rule to live by in general if you ask me). If you’re in NYC I found a lot of these people through the NYC Bloggers link on the right. The rest I found just fucking around over coffee. I’m sure there are others tackling more in-depth subjects, but this is all I can handle first thing in the morning, at noon.

OK Gotta go I have a piece of garlic bread stuck in my gum

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

God Dammit!!!!!!!!

I'm in the middle of a fuckin post and I accidently click off the Blogger site that prompts a box that says OK to save? (click OK) I click OK and *poof!* The whole fuckin post disappears. Now it's 2am and I don't want to be up all night fucking making a journal entry. (cleansing breath) So I won't. It can wait till tomorrow. However, check out the repaired e-mail link to me (so fucking use it! Me like mail) and my newly added list of blogs I follow. The post that disappeared is about why I follow them. Oh well, tomorrow.

Also, ask me about my one man campaign to get Harvey Fierstein to say he's sorry.

Sunday, November 16, 2003

I have gender issues? I don't have gender issues!

I have issues with...
Take Word Association Test

Friday, November 14, 2003

This arrived In my mailbag

Just wanted to drop a line and say hi. I'm R---, 24yo poz guy from Houston. There aren't many of us poz bloggers out there it doesn't seem, or at least, that admit it. I found out April 6, 2000, and like you, the date is stuck in my mind forever. I'm glad you're coping with it and using the blog to do so.

Wanted you to also know that this isn't the first time Harvey has spouted off something totally fucked up. He wrote an Op-Ed in the NYT in July -- -- which I've saved for posterity. So I guess his rant in Next wasn't his first nor will it be his last. Sad, too, for such a visible gay star to be such a complete douche.

Anyways, hope all is well with you and your health. I only know of you, Geekslut, and myself in this country and then a single guy in Britain, who hasn't updated since mid-Sept and could be ill.

R--- M-------


Thanks for the shout out.
My blog started out as a coping thing but became so much more for me. I'm glad to have a link to yours as well I'll add it to my daily reads. Thanks as well for the link to Harvey's NYTimes piece. Apparently, our girl needs to go to school about this subject. And I'm just the fag to teach her a lesson. I'm not going to stop until I know she heard me.

Do you mind if I post this e-mail exchange on my blog?

Please feel free to e-mail me about anything, anytime, much luck and stay well.


So apparently Harvey's rant is part of a larger tack he's taking. Why Harvey has taken to HIV positive bashing is sort of beyond me. Again, I have to believe that he doesn't understand how offensive he's being. But maybe he doesn't care. I ran the whole scenario by a HIV negative guy I talk with on the reg. He totally didn't even need me to explain it to him because he had read the piece and had already seen how it could only be interpreted badly. I got some high praise from Neo who had no idea I was such an aggressive letter writer (In angry letter writing, I'm a top). As he expressed as well, this link that even gay big mouth activists have made that goes HIV positive = sick = terminal = you don't exist is sad and annoying and just.....lazy. If I have to be the one that waves his arms screaming "Hellooooooooo, I'm in the room MUTHAFUCKAS!!!!" I will.

Wednesday, November 12, 2003

That’s Mr. Celebrity Asshole, to you.

“So as a community, we need to come out and say that if you are HIV negative we need you to stay HIV negative, for our future. Our HIV negative people must stay healthy. And that, in a way, is the most controversial part of it. Because then they say “you’re saying there’s something wrong with me because I have HIV.” And I say “Yes, there is something wrong with you. You’re sick. You have a terminal disease. And I don’t want it. And I’m sorry you have it and I will do everything I can to take care of you. But I don’t want another generation lost.”

---- Harvey Fierstein in Next magazine

An open letter to Harvey,

Dear Mr. Fierstein,

Who the fuck do you think you are? As an HIV positive gay man I find your views defeatist, inflammatory, ill informed and downright offensive. You have apparently decided for me that because I’ve been exposed to a virus I’m now sick. That’s funny, I don’t feel sick. I see a doctor on a regular basis. You’d think, since I’m apparently sick, he would have put me on some sort of medication. I’ll have to ask about that. Being sick, I guess it was a mistake to renew my gym membership for another year. You’ve decided I’m sick. What was I thinking working out four times a week? I guess I ought to cut back on those 50 hour work weeks as well.

Wait, it gets worse. Now I’m terminal? Beyond the dying just a little bit every day variety? And me with my affairs all not in order. And here I thought that my family’s rich tradition of heart disease was going to be what ultimately did me in. Turns out it was just some half-witted celebrity pronouncing me terminal. I mean you do know that with treatment (assuming it becomes necessary) I’m just as likely to be hit by a falling piano as to be killed by HIV. It’s not the monster you seem to believe it is. It’s a virus, Harvey. A bug. It may kill me…….someday. But maybe not. And in the meantime I will continue to hold down a job and clean my apartment and order Broadway show tickets a year in advance (although I can think of one I don't want to see anymore) and make financial investments and have dinner and many bottles of wine with good friends. I’m sorry if that sounds all hopeful and forward thinking on my part. It seems you just want me to get the hell out of the way so you can somehow “save” the next generation.

And while we’re on that subject, was there a vote I missed where I became part of a lost generation? I must say, had I been asked I would have reported I don’t feel lost. Indeed, these days, I feel more centered and powerful than I have in years. Centered enough to see an insult wrapped up in a pretty package. I have no doubt your intent is to spare young gay people needless suffering or the discrimination (you claim we HIV positive people don’t suffer) we endure from well meaning HIV negative activists, but I’ll be damned if I let you or anyone else decide to sweep me into some “lost generation” category you’ve dreamed up for me. I’m not finished yet, Harvey. I’m still creating art. I’m still working for charity. I’m still going to re-learn French. I’m still writing angry letters to big mouth activists. I won’t be stopping anytime soon, either. Even if you do decide that I’m sick, dying and lost.

Friday, November 07, 2003

Odds and ends...

I had a connection with my buddy geekslut yesterday. I mailed him after reading his latest post ( something about how he fascinates and scares me at the same time). I got an e-mail from him shortly after. It was a comment about my recent post. Then we chatted back and forth for a couple. About an hour or so later (maybe longer) I got an e-mail reply to my original comment. It was only then that I realized we had originally e-mailed each other independently. Like the phone calls I get when I really want to talk to Neo. Or when people show up at the bar when I was just thinking about them. Wierd? Not in the slightest anymore. I'm paranormal, deal with it.

I do, in fact, read the NY Post on occasion (but I always shower afterward). But Harvey Milk HS Tranny Theives??? Please, oh please let this be true! Would anyone buy Free Brian "Whoopie" Gonzalez T-shirts if I made them?

I managed to artfully work in the fact that I'm HIV+ into a conversation I had with T----. It's part of my continuing effort to just dump it all out there for all to see. It's how I want to live my life and it's been a source of pride and strength for me of late. He was a little surprised but outwardly non-plussed. Nice

Speaking of which. My last group session caused me to make a major revelation to myself. I'm almost done processing and will share this weekend.

Tuesday, November 04, 2003

Newsflash!... Aging former pornstar 86'd from bar!!!

Now I have to admit in the interest of full disclosure I am relating this information without actually being there for all of it but I have interviewed several reliable sources and I believe I have the basic facts right.

A couple of weeks ago one of The Hellcats introduced me to someone he was chatting with. He was nice looking and seemed very friendly. Asked a lot of questions, seemed genuinely curious, a bit rough in an outer-borough (sorry, you have to live here to get that) sort of way. I pegged him for a chatty 30 something who would probably really like you for $150-$200. We talked about photography, he mentioned he had posed for some photographers and I showed him a couple of b&w shots I took that are up in the bar. J--- got him to show me his bicep (I'm so not impressed by that but J--- really is so I could see the attraction) which he did sort of reluctantly which I thought was cute and he complained we don't allow tank tops in the bar (that again....are you seeing the pattern for another reason we don't allow it. It'll turn into an advertisement.) That was that, I thought, after he left. It was only then that J--- said,

"Do you know who that was?"

"No, who?"

"That was ______ ______ (aging former pornstar)."


"Oh really? Oh yeah, I guess it was."

When did she start working the neighborhood? I thought to myself. Oh well, file that under "interesting stuff". Over the course of the next few weeks he was back many times and always said at least a quick hello. He always seemed a little high strung (but not strung out). The only problem I was having was that he was being very open with me and my staff about what he does and why he was there and it's really hard to maintain a "see no hooker speak no hooker" policy when he's coming up confessing all. I tried to subtly let him know that I didn't want to discuss how he made a living but subtlety seemed lost on this guy. Now, before I go any further, when I refer to _____ _____ hot_guys_1_dvd_back.jpg as "aging former pornstar" let me just say that with what I'm sure is a judiscious use of chemical enhancement and an obvious TON of work in the gym this man still has an unbelievable body. (which he would bring up and flash to you right in the middle of a conversation about oh, tension in the Middle East. As in, "Yeah, I bet Arafat doesn't have abs like these.") However, he's not the 22 yr old wonder boy of a decade ago when videos were made with his name in the title and you would rewind the video to the point where his ass just seemed to defy gravity. He's also still very handsome just a little more...... lived. Trust, if he knocked on my front door, dropped his jeans and said "eat me" I'd still go get me a knife fork and napkin. So I re-filed him under "possible future problem" and moved on.

Flash forward to the Thursday before Halloween. I opened, so I was tucked safely into my bed high atop Second Ave when this went down. Apparently, there was a woman in the bar, the same woman I had seen all week. Approaching fifty, never met a martini she didn't like. Sort of a blousy boozy possibly European traveler (not tourist) that will blow into town for a week or a month and for some reason spend a week bellied up to my bar. What usually happens is the gay for pay boys or the true hustlers usually give themselves away falling all over these women. Possibly because they want a little straight boot knockin' but also possibly, because they see a drunk older woman they're thinking easy mark they can pour into a cab and ransack a hotel room. After all, the logic goes, what woman is going to call the cops and admit she got liquored up in a gay bar and took home a twenty something hustler who proceeded to rob her purse? Needless to say, not only do we not condone this kind of behavior but we actively try to nip it in the bud. And admittedley, we're a little attitudinal in the first place because these "gay for pay" boys just rub us fags the wrong way. I mean, to each his own and let's face it, if you consider yourself gay for pay as you go down on dick or get a big stiffy before you take a ride on some guy's ass, I'm so very sorry but you're at least bi. And it seems by considering yourself not gay it perpetuates the thinking that being really gay is wrong or at least other....not me. I had to shoo a regular "patron" away from the same woman a few days earlier and I did it with extreme attitude and it let to a confontation of my own where I let this "patron" know exactly what time it was.

So on this night, the same woman had attracted the attention of _____ _____ how_to_get_a_man_vhs.jpg. Jabba The Drunk must have seen something he didn't like because he felt the need to say something. My sources say Jabba was actually non-confrontational and was just trying to let everyone involved know that the bar manager was keeping an eye on things. Apparently this led to an argument where _____ _____ was saying things like "I'm not your average hustler. " and "I'm not scared of any gay bar manager." And I guess in effect the escort version of "don't you know who I am?". Well, Jabba would have none of that, and rightly so. So before you can say zip up, here comes the cops, _____ _____ bartender_vhs.jpg is being hustled out the door being told I hope you enjoyed your night bacause you're out of here. And with that, _____ _____ wanted_man_vhs.jpg got himself 86'd from the bar.

Let me try to explain why. Contrary to what everyone probably thinks, the collective "we" are not in the sex for money business. We have nothing to do with the people who do. Consequently, we are not going to put up with attitude or drunkeness or fights or any other malfeasence the boys who love you for pay are going to get into. Nor are we going to take any lip from an aging former porn star. Yes we do know who you are and yes, you are just an average hustler and yes, if we are going to turn a (relatively) blind eye as you use my place of business to run one of your own than you damn well are going to do it my way or get out. There have been thousands before you and there will be thousands after. 40 films with you fucking or jerking off makes you...... overexposed. And now that you actually have to get out there and sell yourself, aging former porn star, you need "us" but "we" certainly don't need you. As evidenced by the fact that you tried to talk your way back in four days later. It didn't work.

Now, I could just tell you exactly who it is but I included all you need to know and telling would ruin the spirit of this anonymous blog. So, if you still don't know I'll give you one final clue here. (and let me say, aging former porn star still knows how to find the flattering camera angle)

Monday, November 03, 2003

Halloween Madness...

I would have done my Halloween wrap-up sooner but I was seriously wiped out afterward. I got to the bar at 4pm and started running around getting last minute supplies. I decided to put out more candy so I popped out to the drugstore for some bags of Tootsie Rolls and Smarties and Sweet Tarts, etc. I was looking for Halloween candles to put out but they had been all snapped up by then. The opening staff was running behind as they apparently either failed to factor in dressing/makeup time into their normal duties. (This would be a running theme all night, none of the bars opened on time. The downstairs was almost 45 min late in opening) I was already beginning to boil a little (not at the staff) as people seemed to be getting so aggravated that rooms they wanted open weren't. These were people coming from work who obviously could care less that it was Halloween dressed in child molester trenchcoats that would just stand outside a shut door and glare at me whenever I walked by. People are getting dressed and putting out candy and dressing rooms in other words trying to put on a nice party FOR YOU but god forbid we inconvenience you in any possible way in order to accomplish it.

Anyhow we finally got everyone dressed and everything up and running and Jabba The Drunk arrived to begin the arduous task of fitting a 6'4 "big-boned" man into a blue satin dress so I retired to the employee area to put on my costume and makeup.
I had intended to just do my face and attach some extras like horns and a tail but my staff sort of went off in a sexy, skin-showing direction and I was jealous. I was a little afraid that my back fat would be kind of unattractive but I thought fuck it. So I did a whole body paint thing and I got one word RED! I guess at the right angle I don't look too fat, huh?

My Girls did an exceptional job with their outfits and we all looked great if I do say so myself. I'm not going to post pictures of them because I didn't ask yet but J--- looked really sexy and very cute. He's such a handsome kid. The Hellcats both worked (although I forgot to tell you they have split as roommates) and they looked great but I was obviously quite smitten with M--- that night. I took about 6 pictures of him over the course of the night and a couple of them are fucking hot. I actually asked him as I was taking one picture if he minded if I jerked off to it. Don't worry, this isn't another falling for a coworker what do I do story. This is just lust, as in... you're hot and I want to get in your pants. Lust doesn't confuse me. Lust I know what to do with. Smile and squirm. Actually, I lied. I'll post some pics that are so made up you can't really tell who they are. These are a mix of employees and guests.

Everything went pretty smoothly until around 11 or so when we really filled up. Extreme drunkenness set in at the same time and people started acting the fools all at once. My story of the night goes here. I had taken refuge in the downstairs bar as it was next to impossible to navigate the upstairs. Besides the downstairs bar was where The Hellcat was working and I was thinking I don't know, maybe I can accidently lick him. I'm standing behind the bar when M--- goes "Holy shit! (or something) That guy just bit him! I look across the bar and see a 65 yr old man with a red welt on his cheek. I was stunned for a second but went over to him.

Me: "Hey, did that guy just bite you?"
Man: "Yeah, and it really hurt!"

I could see blood coming to the surface of his cheek. It was that nasty a bite. "The biter" in question had already taken off and I quickly followed up the stairs where he was casually about to blend in with the crowd. I grabbed him and his beer and hurled a few fuckin fuck what the fuck ya doin as I hustled him out the front door. I pointed him out to my doormen and said something like that him.....bite......bad.....86'd but apparently I wasn't clear. I'm back in the piano bar about 10 minutes later and one of my customers grabs me and says,

"Hey isn't that the guy you hustled out of here a few minutes ago?"

I'll be damned it fucking is! So I grab him again,

"What are you fucking stoopid? You fucking bit someone you freak now get the hell out and don't come back!"

all the while hustling him out again.

At some point I had to call the cops on another "patron" who was obviously drunk and high who was basically annoying, terrorizing, fucking with people on the sidewalk as they popped out for a smoke. I was so stressed by now I have no idea what order things happened. It's in a big file in my head labled BAD. But if you can believe it or not a few minutes later I find myself in the front bar and look up just in time to see T---- handing "The biter" a fresh beer. He fucking came back! The top of my head opened and then a demon popped out that grabbed the beer, slammed it on the bar grabbed this crazy bastard and I screamed every swear word I could think of at the top of my lungs and pushed kicked slapped this guy out the front door. Where I then screamed in his face to "GET OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! scaring all the smokers and I'm sure amusing a few of them. I let my doormen know if he got in again someone was fired and that was that. (he did actually try but by then my door knew I was not playin so they shood him off) Why did he bite that man I don't know. Why did he keep coming back after being physically ejected, ... 3 times.... I don't know. Why did I proceed to get drunk and spend all day Saturday with a splitting (non-hangover) headache? That I know.