From The Ashes ...

Feeling Better (Updated!)

My depression seems to be lifting. I managed to do all the laundry that had piled up since the last time I did it (before Christmas). I almost didn't have any choice. I was down to my last pair of gym socks. It was either do the laundry or get to The House of The Bulldyke Convict. But I'm broke ... again. How much do slightly out of shape 40-something hookers fetch these days? I'm kidding. No, seriously, how much? I also put away what meager Christmas decorations we put out this year. It took a grand total of three minutes. Our tree was a fiber optic desktop tree that The Ex bought. I loath it. Now I don't mind my share of blinky fiber optic crap in my household decor but I draw the line at a Christmas tree. It's simply wrong.

Not only did I do the laundry, I took great satisfaction in putting away my laundry. And I hung up my tux from New Year. When I begin to make order from chaos it's a good sign my brain chemistry is returning to "normal". I cleaned off the dining area table and put all the holiday pictures into protective plastic as I'm sure they will be passed around tomorrow at work. Speaking of work, I ironed two shirts in advance. A sure sign that, while maybe not looking forward to it, I'm at least mentally prepared to get back in there and mix it up with the retards in Times Square.

Finally, I did a bit of personal ... grooming. OK more than a bit but not a ton. I didn't shave so much as trim in most areas. I know some people disagree but I'm a firm believer that your body is just a general template for you to work off of. I'm totally in the "make better" camp. Shave, pluck, tan, crunch, run, color, yoga even lipo. Whatever it takes, baby, if it makes you happy and you think you look and feel better. And when your vanity kicks in you know the depression is fading. Depressed people don't shave back their pubic hair.

Meanwhile ...

Nelson Mandela's son dies from AIDS-related illness.

The gays caused the tsunami.

U.S. soldier claims "gay panic" made him kill. (With all due respect, am I the only one slightly turned on by the mental image of the 21 year-old National Guardsman and the 17 year-old Iraqi?

Speaking of which ...

Hundreds of protesters in Egypt decry ‘homosexual American executioners’

CAIRO — Egyptian demonstrators, protesting the abuse of prisoners by U.S. troops at an Iraqi prison, blamed the incidents on “homosexual American executioners,” according to media reports. A Dec. 29 rally in Cairo followed other Middle East protests over photos that show abuse and torture of prisoners at Iraq’s Abu Ghraib prison, news outlets reported. Many abuses were sexual, and photos showed that nude male prisoners were forced to pile on top of each other and were forced to simulate oral and anal sex with each other, according to media reports. Prisoners also alleged they were sodomized with broom handles and other objects while at Abu Ghraib and in U.S. custody, news agencies reported. The Kuwait Times reported that 300 Egyptian protesters rallied last week before a banner that read, “Bring to justice the homosexual American executioners, their agents the traitors, their followers the enemies.” The Times also said Mustafa Bakri, editor of the Al-Osboa weekly newspaper, told reporters, “Those gays forced our brothers in Iraq to practice homosexuality and filmed them. If we remain silent, we will be next.

For god's sake! If the U.S. military insists on sodomizing people with a broom handle, I will take one for the team and spare those poor Iraqis. Get me a horny soldier (male, please and Latin if you can manage) and some lube.