Friday, January 13, 2006

Unexpected Side Effects

So I intended to raid the cookie jar tonight and go out for a cocktail or ten. Of course, here I find myself at 1:30 am watching the positively heinous re-make of Cheaper By The Dozen. I can't seem to get the enthusiasm up to make "the scene". Not that anything's horribly wrong. Quite the opposite, in fact. I had a pretty uneventful afternoon followed by a very aggressive work-out. My titties are huge! Just kidding. I am trying to live on the cheap and I've been stretching $300 out since just before Christmas. I still have about 50 bucks left. I've applied for unemployment, intending to take some time off before I re-group and find a new job. Unfortunately, there has been some sort of delay. My unemployment payments are "pending". Four weeks late. Should make for a helluva first check once it finally comes. I have "plenty" of money for now so no worries. Finally, my ability to live the life of a pauper has an up-side.

I've been meaning to tell you about some unexpected side effects of going on the HIV meds. Aside from the bad parts, where my brains briefly scrambled and I thought I might not ever get off the toilet, some unexpectedly good things happened. Long time readers of this blog will remember my lamenting how utterly and extremely gassy I had become. I'd link to it but I'm way too lazy. Trust, it was epic. Seriously. As in, no man would ever have me gassy. I un-ashamedly discussed it with two different nutritionists, so distressed was I by the thunderous and unrelenting levels of gas I was manifesting. Curiously, now that my viral load is almost under control the unrelenting and unimaginable level of gas I was manufacturing has dissipated like so much, well, gas. Do I know for a fact that the extreme farting was caused by the HIV? All I know is two full years (at least) of unstoppable farting has stopped. You tell me.

In addition, a series of dental visits confirmed what I already knew. My gums were seriously fucked. Not that my oral hygiene wasn't good. While I've never been much of a flosser I brush two, three or more times a day. But the last few years every time I brushed my teeth I bled. Sometimes a bit, sometimes rivers of blood would pour from my gums. It got so bad I would leave flecks of blood on a banana when I ate. The dentist I was seeing recommended a procedure where they lift your gums up and scrape out the gunk underneath and then re-attach your gums. The dental-phobe in me was horrified. But I had begun to mentally prepare for the procedure. Curiously again, I noticed about two weeks ago that the bleeding has stopped. I can and have really scrubbed at my brushing, just to see what would happen. Nothing, Not even a bit of pink. It's been that way for a few weeks now. Do I know for a fact that my viral load was causing an infection in my gums? No. But I know for sure that since bringing my viral load under control, the daily bleeding from my gums has stopped. You tell me.

Since I'm confessing all my unattractive flaws anyway, (but doing it in the name of science) the last thing I want to tell about is athlete's foot. I've had it off and on for years. Way before my seroconversion. I love that word, it sounds like I've joined a church. I know that athlete's foot is caused by a fungus, and I seemed like a pretty accommodating host. I would catch it pretty easily, as I never bothered with that gym/sandal nonsense. It wasn't until I went on the multi-vitamin extra C regimen from when I was first diagnosed that I noticed that the condition had cleared. And it hasn't come back in a couple of years. So I conclude that either the fungus was able to thrive because of a vitamin deficiency in me, or athlete's foot and HIV don't mix. I suspect it's the former but if it turns out the latter is the case, I don't recommend the cure.

These are strictly my own experiences and are based on cause and effect. Anyone else have some unexpected results? I'd love to hear.

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