From The Ashes ...

I Got The 411 On Codes

Are you Happy in Vancouver? It may only be local to "the gays" in British Columbia, but that's the secret code they use to find out your status. Get it? Happy in Vancouver. - via buggery.org

I am totally 429. This one's a stretch. You have to check your phone key pad. 4 = ghi, 2 = abc, 9 =wxyz. Europeans, go figure. - via Steph & Alek

Here's some more 411. Some may say T.M.I. but what the hell ....

In my continuing effort to bring relevant HIV information to people (like me) who need it, I frequently stumble across things that I never knew, I never heard discussed. And I'm always amazed and a little pissed off. I guess I should just be glad the information is out there for me to find. For example:

I had no idea that Sustiva and indeed many other commonly prescribed HIV meds can cause moderate to severe depression, anxiety and in some cases psychosis. People already dealing with problems like this should be made aware of the possibility before beginning treatment so at the very least, if you feel a severe depression or other psychological changes start to happen you would know where to begin looking. I only became aware of it from seeing doctor/patient questions posted on-line.

From another forum where someone just beginning treatment and complaining of dehydration asked for advice, I found out that just being HIV+ (without meds) can cause dehydration or cause you to feel extreme thirst. So the extreme thirst and dehydration I've been feeling for over three years is probably not all in my head but real. Seriously. I have water with me all day. Every day. I drink on average 4-6 pints of water a day. I thought it would go away once I quit smoking. It didn't. I thought it was from drinking and while that made it worse, my current end of the night Stoli/soda (or two) wouldn't be enough to cause it. Dehydration is a common issue with the HIV virus. Just in case anybody else is walking around totally parched all the time and thinking you're a tad crazy.

And lastly, at the risk of embarrassing myself completely once and for all:

"Hello, my name is Tom and I fart."

"Hi, Tom."

My story goes something like this. Up until (again) about three or four years ago, I was a normal farter. The occasional fart at night on the couch while watching a video. My farting was what you would expect of a normal human who farts normally. Usually pretty harmless, once in a while quite odiferous. If anything, the only remarkable thing about gasses escaping my body against my will is that I hardly ever burp. I don't supress them I just don't burp. But all that has changed. The last few years I have been uncontrollably flatulent. Well, not uncontrollably, I guess. I can in fact control it if I have to. Usually in the morning and then again at night (anywhere from 10pm on), I become the gassiest gassbag from Gassville, USA. I fart. Loudly and repeatedly. Sometimes for hours.They are frequently big, tremendous, rumbling farts from deep in the land of Big Fartville. Usually about fifteen minutes apart in time. Sometimes I doubt that a human can carry around as much gas as I expel.. And it does seem to be just gas. There's no pain, and usually no "unpleasantness", just air. Lots and lots of air escaping my butthole with a thunder reserved for Thor himself. I would frequently have to go into my office at work (when I had a job) and just rip a few off for an hour or so. I would try to time a paperwork task, like payroll, to my volcanic sphincter so I could calculate and fart at the same time. I'm a good multitasker. I thought it was a getting old thing. Funny though, as much as my uncles and Dad freely discussed prostate and various urinary problems, I'd never once heard them mention exploding the buttseam on a pair of pajamas as a side effect to aging. Turns out, the real culprit may be my old pal HIV. This article has all the information including this salient point:

First, HIV itself can contribute to intestinal gas. HIV naturally gravitates towards the gut, which provides a hospitable environment for the virus. A high viral load in the gut will disrupt normal functions and can result in gastrointestinal distress -- a polite way of referring to diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, and gas.

So the next time you're in the gym and the guy next to you is doing crunches, and just as he's quietly calling out number 29 he loudly rips a huge fart, don't laugh. He may be HIV+. Thankfully, I haven't been seeing anyone these last couple of years. (There's a sentence that was painful to write.) Leaving me free to fart at will in private. A closet farter, if you will. But now you know my secret shame.