From The Ashes ...

While You Were Out

Sorry. It appears I lapsed into a minor depression. Not the extreme depression I've experienced before. More of a normal "low" that seems to usually follow the occasional "high". I spent about four days feeling extremely focused able to multitask in a variety of fields. I would cook dinner and dinner for tomorrow at the same time. I was watching a PBS show on money and investing while installing mirror tile in the living room. I purchased four things online. Two are in support of a cell phone that I found at work about six months ago. I pulled it out again the other day ( I have a tendancy to rummage when I'm manic) and remarked to myself that it seemed like a pretty nice phone. Just for the hell of it I Googled it and what do you know, the phone lists for sale at about $280. You can get it on Ebay for under $200. I had a thought that you could probably talk the people that sell phone plans into activating a phone that "technically" didn't belong to you. After further research I discovered that you can by a new battery for any phone, no surprise there, but you can also purchase a new computer chip for it too. In effect making the phone new and "yours". Believe me, I know for a lot less trouble you can get a free phone just for signing up with a plan but in my mania I've focused on this phone. I want this phone. I hate those free, tiny little matchbox phones. This phone can send/recieve text, email and browse the web. It's got a color screen. Most important this phone has bulk. It's a man's phone *Rrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrr*. Suck my phone. Suck it!

The nice part of the minor depression that follows the mania is that I emerge more rational, more contemplative. The bad part is that I exist totally in my own head, the danger being my internal dialogue has a tendancy to turn dark. I torture myself with what ifs and how come's. I imagine worst case scenarios and then practically live it. Usually, and hopefully, like now, I catch it before I start back down a road I never want to travel again. Instead of sad and scared I feel peaceful and able. I decided I want to re-do the kitchen. Partly because it will be fun and partly because now that I cook a lot, I've discovered that it's really not set up very efficiently. Before I do it though I've made a pledge to finish the other room makeovers I've started. I have no idea why, but I start these extreme room makeovers and then right when they're almost done I just stop and move on to something else. In the bathroom, I need to finish off the area right under the sink. Put in a little storage shelf and then curtain it off. In the living room. I need to replace the mirror tiles (done), hang curtains (half done), replace an end table (done) and put in a couple of rolling ottomans and some plants. That sounds like a lot but it really isn't much and I've made a promise to myself that I don't get to buy/make/do one thing in the kitchen until I finish the details in the other two rooms. I'm sure there is some psychological explanation for this behavior but I'll just call it "wierd".

I've been taking online tutorials on a variety of subjects including Excel and Frontpage. It's really pretty easy. I'm exploring the details of trying some actual online courses. Do online degrees actually count for anything? Can you get hired with an online degree?

I feel much better now. I'm gonna get a nosh, shave my man parts and then hit the gym. It's a beautiful day.