"On turning 50 I was perplexed about exactly how I was supposed to feel. I struggled with the feelings that I am very lucky and privileged to have survived AIDS twenty years, but in reality I still just felt ... old.
This time of my life has been thought-provoking yet confusing. Aging has sort of snuck up on me. It has been hard to accept growing older while living with HIV in our judgmental and antagonistic society. As an older person with HIV, I face the unknowns of a longer life with a virus that, despite successful treatment, continues to smolder within an aging body and immune system. There is really no precedent for the situation that many people, like myself, find themselves in. Yet, as the clock ticks on, I remain committed to my own fight against AIDS."
Great article via The Body.com by Matt Sharp. Read more here ...
As I have stated, those of us moving into their 50's and 60's are pioneers to an age that is now being researched and studied. Unfortunately, we don't have much in the way of other resources to pull from, as this is the first generation of Americans living, surviving, with HIV after 50. And the double stigma of getting older in a youth-obsessed culture while dealing with the sexual minefield of HIV is not always the laugh-riot it sounds like on the surface.