From The Ashes ...

Hate Me I Don't Care

This was in the news recently. I have mentioned on many occasions how deeply I was affected by the destruction of the World Trade Center. For the record, I hate hate hate this new trend of giving serious and monumental acts/wars/events a catchy, easy to reference name, a McName if you will so you won't have me referring to this horrific destruction as 9/11. As a city and as people we have been and we continue to be affected by the aftermath of this tragedy.

Having said that, and after being fed a steady and increasing stream of memorials and planned tributes and news coverage for next week being hyped in advance. I find myself taking the unpopular position of saying enough is enough! This ridiculousness about a memorial and this obsession with "the footprint" is just another way for people who can't move on to stay where they are. And I'll tell you why. It started in Oklahoma City. It continued in Columbine. And then it moved right on in and parked itself on lower Manhattan. It's an American need to "me too" everything and I'll tell you an ugly little truth. It's a way for people to get attention. The Oklahoma City terrorist (home grown - USA! USA!) attack was an awful heinous moment in time. And then the cameras and the reporters came and peoples suffering appeared on Oprah and well, if it gets you on Oprah it has to be important. And then the Memorial. Oh god, the Memorial. It's sweeping and majestic and somehow manages to tastefully convey the pain of those that were left behind and it will keep our lost blah blah blah blah. And suddenly everybody needs to have a memorial. And it absolutely must be sweeping and majestic. The shuttle astronauts need a memorial. The WW2 veterans need a memorial. The Japanese holding camp survivors need a memorial. sweeping and majestic , natch. So of course we have to have a memorial for the victims of the World Trade Center Destruction. And another in the field where the plane went down. And they must be sweeping. And majestic. And most of all bigger! To signify our big errrr pain. Yeah, that's it! When all it really is is a bunch of people who have figured out if they make the right kind of noise about the right subject at the right time somebody may stick a microphone in your face because otherwise nobody was ever going to care one whit what you had to say about any subject so you get this:

"An irreplaceable part of our American heritage is being systematically destroyed," said protester Beverly Eckert, who lost her husband in the 2001 attacks.

What the hell does that mean? When did the outline of a previously standing building become a part of my American heritage? Or yours? Please understand, I'm not suggesting we don't mark the anniversary next week. And I'm not suggesting that we don't build the most beautiful memorial we know how to build on the site. Let's build a big damn over the top only in New York "memorial this, Oklahoma City" memorial. But it really doesn't interest me if it's on the whole footprint, or half the footprint, or the big toe. And I suspect, it doesn't really matter to the victims' families either. Not really. But the press can't interview indifference. And they don't ask you questions about how you're healing. Although they should. As for this nonsense about the site being hallowed ground now. You know what your likely to find if you dig around lower Manhattan? Well, there'd be a layer of black people killed during a Great Moment in New York History. Below that, a layer of dead Indians. Uh-huh. Yeah. We killed 'em. Dead. What did we do? Built buildings on it. Apparently it only became consecrated ground when white people earning 75k or more driving a Lexus died there. (hops off high horse).

Which leads us here. I'm so sorry for this families' pain. But what is this goulish desire for a body part to bury? To the point where you wait two full years to have a service and then bury a vial of blood? Has our reaction to death and loss become so ritualized that we can't begin to mourn and maybe heal without some set ceremony some set of rules that must be followed? I need no such ceremony to understand the finality of death. When my sister died several years ago I didn't need to see her bloated body in a casket to know my neice's mother wasn't coming back. As I said at her eulogy, death, any death diminishes us all. You need to acknowledge that fact and take the time to mark and celebrate the life of the person you have lost. And then you need to say goodbye. But that doesn't have to happen
at a $10,000. funeral with bagpipes playing and people flailing themselves across coffins. You don't become a man in the age of AIDS without at least shaking the hand of the Grim (it's the outfit) Reaper and asking him to come back another day, thanks. The ritual of death is not the point. Saying I'll miss you and goodbye is. And two years is too long to wait to say it. The body never mattered. The spirit within did.

We need to keep some things in mind as well. Instead of getting all bogged down in the footprint and the memorial (sweeping and majestic though it be), we would do well to remember we're living on an island here. Space is limited. Nine million of us have to live and work and survive here every day. Because that's what we all are. Survivors. And if you really want to show the world something impressive, take the space that used to be a symbol (some say) of America's greed and avarice and our monument to all things biggest, and build a shitload of affordable housing on it. American's will move in fuck like bunnies and make more Americans. And won't that frost some Iraqi butt?